A short barreled 12 gauge shotgun rode up front with me.

For all of the twenty plus years that I put in driving Jackie and our fifth wheel trailer around North America I carried a shotgun by my drivers seat. The gun made an impressive sound when you pumped a cartridge into the chamber. I was hoping that this sound would scare any bad guys away. In all of my rving travels I never felt that the gun was needed. It did make me feel secure.

After I sold my truck and somewhat permanently parked the trailer I carried a pistol in my pocket. I traveled alone in my car. Jackie passed away 11 years ago. I have gone through the expensive and involved procedure to obtain a Louisiana "Concealed Handgun Permit". I did it a second time when my first permit expired. My current permit is good for several more years.

I would go target practice every month or two. This was to keep me comfortable with the use of my pistol. One time I was gone from home for several months. I paid to use the shooting range in Port Townsend.

I am a great admirer of John Wayne. (Fill your hand you son of a bitch!) This is my favorite movie line. I have always liked and been interested in guns. Except for my time in the Army I never did use them much, however.

I have a conflicting admiration. I have aways admired pacifists that held strong to their belief. During WW II I admired the actor Lew Ayres. He was the star in "All Quiet on the Western Front" His stand, as a conscientious objector caused much discussion early in WW II. He later served as a combat medic on Leyte. I was on Leyte for a short time at the same time Lew was.

About three years ago I began having second thoughts about carrying a gun. I was a strange case. I had strong pacifist feelings but carried a gun so I could wound or kill. Also I was over 90 years old. I felt very uncomfortable at the thought of killing some one for an old man with one foot in the grave.

So I sold my guns and hung up my license to carry. I can tell you that I feel better (less stress) without a gun in my pocket. From now on I will defend myself by talking or running. I am not a very good runner but I have been told that I talk a lot.